• tamaranedkov

My Deep, Dark Secret

Quote from Aibileen Clark - You is Kind. You is Smart. You is Important.
It's so important to be kind to yourself.

It's not huge. I haven't murdered anyone (although I do have a reoccurring dream that I do! but we can save that for another day!). 2019 is my year! It's the year I stop pretending and start assuming the role of who I know I can be. I've had a lot of false starts over the years. I've hired business coaches, signed up for online courses, attended workshops and not until very recently when I decided to pull out all the material I've accumulated determined to put my idea's into action did I realize the content of all these courses has been pretty much the same. Looking over all the work I've done these past 7 years just served as confirmation of what I want.

I know my truth, I know my mission, I know where I want to go. The only thing holding me back is...well..me!

I think I am finally willing to tell the crazy lady in my head to back down and let me do my work. Let me be there for others that have had similar situations and are still struggling. And let me do it in a way that allows personal growth and expansion for all.

Over the last 25 years I have done a ton of work on myself with the aid of licensed therapists, holistic therapists, shamans, psychics, tea leaves, Magic 8 Ball....you name it. Always searching for someone to take me by the hand and lead me in the right direction. When I was a very young age I got it in my head that I wasn't good enough. I looked too ethnic. I wasn't smart like my older sisters. I was WAY too social. I was actually condemned and bullied for being "nice" (It's taken the last 15 years to unwind that puppy!)

I choose to see the best in people and recognize we are sometimes faulted. I take responsibility when I mess up and try to see my part, my lesson. I certainly know I am not perfect. I can be triggered by my spouse and my kids very easily. I have patience now to sit back and breathe and not unleash the crazy lady and a can of whoop ass on a whim (most of the time).

For 2019 I am starting a new chapter. I am living out loud. I've been told that I have a unique way of relating to people and I feel like I can be of service in that regard. All this while discovering the other side of my brain, the business side, expanding my business and hopefully helping others to do the same.

So bring it, 2019. I'm ready willing and able? I want more. More freedom, more laughter, more love, more abundance. Are you with me?

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